Around age two, kids’ personalities are blossoming, Two-year-old children are funny and charming and may express themselves well verbally.
That’s because the toddler brain will be changing in major ways during early childhood
It’s will be sprouting new connections between brain cells at an astonishing rate, and it is beginning to prune back unnecessary connections. And the prefrontal cortex, the brain area behind the forehead that helps with planning and other tricky cognitive tasks, is nowhere near complete.
Researchers, professors of pediatrics says that when parents and doctors talk about developmental milestones, they should really be talking about milestones of self-regulation too.
But while a toddler’s brain is still building the areas that will let them control their feelings, their sense of self is also emerging. At age two, they know they are their own person. That realization is bringing big new emotions, like pride in accomplishments and a growing desire to do things for themselves.
Kids are born with different temperaments—some are highly reactive, while others are more mellow and can go with the flow. No matter where your child falls on the meltdown meter, there are ways you can deal with overwhelming emotions.
First, manage your expectations. “In parenting, our expectations shape the way we respond,”
The environment at home can also help with the development of self-regulation. “Parents play a remarkably important part in helping create healthy brains,”
Parents being too strict or giving too much freedom makes it harder for a child to learn self-regulation.
“Kids learn emotional regulation from the people around them,”
It’s normal to feel angry with your kid sometimes, but remember that they’re observing how you handle your own feelings too.
To avoid meltdowns in the first place, know your child and their triggers. Being hungry and tired are common causes of toddler malaise. Pickup time from childcare and scgools is often tricky too. And it’s common for kids to hold it together during the day, then break down when they come home to the parents they love and trust,
When your toddler starts to get upset, you may feel ridiculous saying, “Yes, it’s very frustrating that your favorite pajamas are in the laundry,” or “You’re angry But labeling and validating their feelings helps them learn to manage them.
“We all want our children to be happy, but you don’t raise a happy child by having them happy every second of every day,” “Being a happy human being means that we have the skills to manage difficult emotions.”